Freddy Vs. Jason

Chris feels sorry for all those little kids that grow up thinking The Others is a horror movie.


It’s finally here. Freddy Vs. Jason. Finally we can settle those playground arguments of who’s a better bad guy. Freddy? Or Jason? I’m a fan of both, though I’d have to say Freddy’s disappointed me on much less an occasion. I saw my first Nightmare on elm Street when I was about 6. It was Nightmare on Elm Street 3 and was playing on network television. I snuck into my dad’s den to watch the film. For a house with 7 televisions it was easy to sneak off and watch a film on tv that the parents wouldn’t rent for you. The fact we had HBO also helped me see a lot more movies than my 6 year-old self would have been allowed under normal circumstances. Shortly thereafter I saw my first Friday the 13th film in the same room. The week before Halloween they showed Friday the 13th Part 3. Funny coincidence both films I saw first were part three in their respective series. It may be why they are both hold a special place in my heart when it comes to the Nightmare and Friday films.

Back in those days the deaths were all shown intact. There was no censoring of violence for network television. They just didn’t show the boobies. My favorite Elm Street’s include Nightmare 3, 1, and Wes Craven's New Nightmare. 4 and 2 were pretty entertaining. The only two I couldn’t sit through were Freddy’s Dead and the Dream Child. As for the Friday the 13th’s, I’ve loved 2, 3, 6 and 7. Jason Goes to Hell and Jason takes Manhattan (despite Kelly Hu starring in the film) were unadulterated shit, and Lexa Doig’s hotness was Jason X’s only saving grace.

With Freddy Vs. Jason I’d have to say I have added another favorite film to both series. The film will please Jason fans as well as Freddy fans, and only serve to spark debate between the two camps over who’s the best killer, at least until Freddy vs. Jason: Round 2 comes out.

Does the film do justice to both characters? Absolutely. It combines some of the best elements from both series, while still staying true to the original stories. Does the plot make sense? Not really. It didn’t make any sense when Abbot and Costello met Frankenstein, the wolfman, and Dracula in the same film and that film was one of the best monster matchups in the history of horror films.You could drive a fleet of mack trucks through some of these plot holes, but did I care? HELL NO! I was having WAY too much fun to care about plot holes of any kind. And that’s what this film is all about. Pleasing the fans, and giving you a wildly fun ride.

I’m sure you’ve read many synopsis of the storyline so I’ll make mine short. All teens that have had nightmares of Freddy have been locked up in Springwood’s mental hospital and doped up with Hypnocil in order to prevent them from dreaming. The Elm Street kids have completely forgotten Freddy and are no longer afraid of him. They’ve never encountered him in a dream, and therefore have no reason to be afraid. Due to their “forgetting” Freddy no longer has enough power/influence to enter the kids dreams and kill them. He enlists the aid of Jason, who he pulled down to hell at the end of Jason goes to Hell, in order to teach the Elm Street Teens to fear again. Jason goes up to elm street to kill a few kids, but naturally gets a bit out of hand. Freddy gets mad and tries to off Jason before he steals all his prospects.

The end fight is more badass than the Wolverine/Lady Deathstrike fight at the end of X-2. Each character beats the crap out of each other, in both the dream world and the real world. The blood flies generously enough to please even the most bloodthirsty horror fans. Freddy’s one liners are all there. Jason’s brutal kills are just as spectacular as ever, and there are more gratuitous breast shots than you can shake a stick at. Actually the boobs were the only special effects that looked fake as hell in this film. I think it’s the first time fake boobs have been shown so prominently in either series. I remember the day when not every teenage girl and their mother had fake plastic melons that were bigger than their heads. But aside from that everything else about this movie is totally badass. Naturally the teens are just fodder for Jason and Freddy until they get to the big battle at the end. And what a battle it is.

Freddy Vs. Jason is THE perfect summer movie for horror fans. Go to the theatre with a bunch of your closest buds. Grab a coke, some popcorn, and check your brain at the door. The movie’s a blast. Sure, critics will hate this film, but it will thrill fans from both camps, and that’s exactly what it set out to do.

--Chris Nelson



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