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Dukes of Hazzard movie review
DUKE IT OUT
There was a brief moment where I would’ve admitted that Johnny Knoxville was the hottest thing on the planet. Not as strange as my first real celebrity crush on Ivan Lendl (the stellar stoic tennis pro), but there are some similarities due to their stamina and offbeat handsomeness and trim muscle tone. [...]
Wedding Crashers movie review
IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH When I saw Clay Pigeons, I was like “Vince Vaughn is cool.” When I found out he was 6’5”, I was like “Vince Vaughn is hot.” I’m not being superficial here, I mean he’s rather goofy looking and kinda paunchy, but I recognized an interesting caricature in him. [...]
Batman Begins movie review
Is it really worth nine bucks? I had really paid little to no attention to the making of this film, but in the weeks leading up to its release I gradually caught the Batman bug. The weekend it released, I was darn ready to slap down the $18.00 necessary to get Kris and I in [...]
S.W.A.T. he-said-she-said movie review / dreamlogic.net’s Infamous “GAY” Pictorial!
“ALRIGHT, LET’S PUT THIS FROG IN THE BIRD!”
Starring Colin Farrell, Michelle Rodriguez, Samuel L Jackson, Ladies Love Cool James, Jeremy Renner (aka Tobey Maguire)
HE-SAID:
I must say, this has been the week of surprises. After seeing the trailer for SWAT, which proudly proclaimed it was from the producers of XXX and The Fast and the Furious [...]
The Punisher movie review screener!
SHE SAID: Heylos all. We caught a late screener on Thursday night but haven’t had the chance to get around to the review until now.
The Punisher leaps and pounces, offering relentless action while shifting giddy humour to charismatic overdrive. Akin to this, you’ll see a tricked-out 1969 Pontiac GTO complete with a huge Pontiac [...]
The Bourne Supremacy movie review screener!
HE SAID: Admittedly, after watching the Bourne Identity, I wasn’t really that concerned whether there was a sequel or not. Sure, the film was interesting, and far more intelligent than your average action-espionage flick, but there wasn’t really anything that left me wanting more. So, in approaching the new-Bourne, I was firmly grounded in [...]
The Stepford Wives (2004) movie review screener!
“[I felt] as if someone had poured shit in my eyes”
–Fernando Croce of Cinepassion.org
While I didn’t feel as strongly against the look of the new Stepford Wives, there was no denying its assault on my patience. Unrelentingly annoying humor, seemingly ripped from today’s worst sitcom fare, the film seems tailor made to satisfy the intellects [...]
Chronicles of Riddick he-said-she-said movie review screener!
SHE SAID: Okay, pretend we live in Riddick’s world. Like most sci-fi/action flicks, pretend the laws of physics and logic do not exist. So if we nit-picked and tore this movie to shreds, we would be hard pressed to discover flaws because in Riddick’s world, running across magma fields in 300 degrees without a [...]
Van Helsing he-said-she-said movie review screener!
STEPHEN SOMMERS STICKS IT WHERE THE SUN DON’T SHINE SHE SAID: God damned Dracula and Van Helsing to an eternity of Hell on earth, and tonight, Chris and I suffered along with them (well, at least for half of the movie). Straddling chaos and eye candy and mutantoid bat babies rose poignant moments, but those [...]
Kill Bill vol. 2 guest movie review
The first half of Quentin Tarantino’s “Kill Bill” was an action fever dream with moments of disproportionate intensity worthy of Michael Powell or Brian De Palma. In “Vol.2,” the tempo slows down but the characters deepen and expand as the saga comes to an end. The film should really be seen as a whole – [...]
Walking Tall movie he-said-she-said review screener!
THE ROCK’S COOKIN LEFTOVERS First and foremost I must admit I haven’t had time to see the original Walking Tall, nor do I know the true story of Sheriff Buford Pusser, on which both films are based. However I’m a fan of Johnny Knoxville, and have been pretty happy with The Rock’s action resume so [...]
Taking Lives he-said-she-said movie review screener!
SHE SAID: This is weird. I thought that this movie was going to go all out crazy. I thought it was going to touch upon the paranormal profiling abilities of a renegade cop who was tracking down some guy from an X-Files episode who could miraculously transform himself into anyone he wished. Or at [...]
Underworld dvd movie review
VAMPIRES AND WEREWOLVES? COOL!! ..OR MAYBE NOT I remember being stoked about this film when I first saw the trailer attached to Wrong Turn. I mean, come on! Vampires fighting Werewolves! How much better could it get? As long as they didn’t churn out something as godawful as Howling VI (the other vampires against werewolves [...]
Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) movie review screener!
At first I was completely opposed to the idea of remaking the original Texas Chain Saw Massacre. The film was perfect. How could they make anything better than what they already had? But after a while I thought about my favorite remakes of all time. Invasion of the Body Snatchers with Leonard Nimoy, Willard with [...]
Stuck on You he-said-she-said movie review test-screener!
CHRIS PONDERS the ‘Mendes Formula’: Hey guys, Kris and I just attended a test screening for Stuck on You, the Farrelly Brothers’ conjoined twin comedy starring Matt Damon, Greg Kinnear, Cher, and Eva Mendes. While technically not a full review, as they have a chance to fix many of the problems following the [...]
Intolerable Cruelty he-said-she-said movie review screener!
HE SAID: Ah, this review has been in the cooker for 3 days now. It’s always harder to review a film you’re sort of indifferent to. I’ll tell you straight out that Intolerable Cruelty is a funny film, though not as frenetic and quirky as O Brother Where Art Thou, Raising Arizona, or Barton [...]
Kill Bill vol. 1 he-said-she-said movie review Screener! +japanese-cut dvd!
WHY CAN’T WE BE FRIENDS?
HE SAID: Kill Bill Vol. 1 is Quentin Tarantino’s loveletter to exploitation, grindhouse, and overall bad-taste cinema. He references absolutely everything he loves: De Palma, Switchblade Sisters, Shaw Brothers films (it actually opens with the shaw scope logo), Japanese samurai splatter, Italian Giallos, Master of the Flying Guillotine, etc, [...]
The Rundown he-said-she-said movie review screener!
HE-SAID: The Rundown was the most fun I’ve had with an action film since Pirates, and it was one of the very few I’d gladly watch again. Those of you that had a hard time comprehending the storyline of
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