Damn Punks!

by Kris   ⋅   May 24, 2006   ⋅   Comment now   ⋅    RSS

WANTED: Three caucasian males in their late teens/early twenties for loitering and suspicious activities. The three were wearing black pants with black shirts probably depicting the devil music they listen to these days. Their obvious ringleader was wearing a leather bracelet (fairy!) with faux metal spikes. His dirty blonde hair was also spiky in fashion. Typical punks. Or typical gen xy punks that is.

They were last seen in downtown Mountain View not only staring at but chucking a FULL bottle of Calistoga brand mineral water at Le Boulanger.. well actually behind Le Boulanger by that, uhm little landscaped sidewalky area back there. In fact, they could have possibly been tossing it into a waste receptacle, but we can’t be sure. Anyway, if you have any information at all on their whereabouts, please promptly alert your local authorities. The trio are wanted for questioning and some possible parental whoop-ass.

We at the Mountain View Police Dept realize that it’s a little out of character for us to be harassing white people for a change (instead of some rich guy’s gardener), but do not forget that we also discriminate against the young and the weird. Thank you for your time.