Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust — game review
Is it too much to ask of those in charge of franchise reboots to simply play the original game series they’re tasked with reinvigorating? I mean, is it really that hard? I’ve crossed paths with two such games these past few weeks, and the experiences with both have been anything but enjoyable.
First up, Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust (I’ll cover the second transgressor in a subsequent article). I loved the original Leisure Suit Larry games. Absolutely loved them. They were smart adventure games featuring quality, quirky puzzles, a dash of adult humor, and most importantly, a lovable loser protagonist. The original Larry games remain as enjoyable today as the day they were first released. Box Office Bust…well, it’s nothing short of a travesty.
Now, technically Box Office Bust is a sequel to the Vivendi’s Magna Cum Laude reboot, but it’s the first effort by Team 7, the programming team behind the ever-famous Worms games. I was actually kind of excited when I heard about their involvement, as it seemed to bode well for the future of the series. Heck, I thought. If this game can prove successful, maybe they can fanagle getting the gaming suits to let Al Lowe back on the creative team. Alas, their product makes Magna Cum Laude look like classic literature.
I can imagine the Team 7 reboot meeting in my head. “This Laser Larry game was pretty popular in the past. Just check out the screen shots. The game had hot chicks! We should remake it to be something today’s audiences would like.” 
“What type of game was it?” “An adventure game. With hot chicks.” “What’s an adventure game?” “Like, Grand Theft Auto, of course” “Awesome. We can do that.”
Yep, you heard right. Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust is the first Larry game to rely on Grand Theft Auto style sandbox play, complete with traipsing over a humongous game world in order to find glowing destination circles and hidden trophies. You can’t even talk to anyone anymore. You just fetch things. And when you do reach your glowing circle, you’re treated to a criminally unfunny cutscene (the “comedic” script was handled by the Happy Madison guys, and the result is something even worse than Strange Wilderness), followed by inane minigames. And yes, again, these mini games make the Magna Cum Laude minigames look like Mensa puzzlers. The first few see Larry cleaning spray-painted dicks off of porno movie posters, and collecting pages of a script strewn across the movie lot. While Al Lowe’s Larry was targeted toward smart people looking to exercise their abstract logic skills in a realm of playful adult fun, Box Office Bust targets those people just receiving the evolutionary benefit of opposable thumbs. It’s literally one of the few gaming experience where I could actually feel my brain rotting while playing it.
Here’s a dialog sample, complete with evidence of terrible treatment they’ve given the original, lovable Larry.:
Oh, and speaking of thumbs, I should probably mention the controls. Box Office Bust is completely unplayable on the computer without an XBox gamepad. Many portions of the game involve an isometric view with a fixed camera, only the control scheme isn’t rotated to match. Futhermore the isometric rotation something like 30degrees, rather than 45, so pressing left and up together won’t help you successfully navigate a diagonal ledge. Then there’s the fact that all game commands are noted with “B1”, “B2”, “B4” icons, even when the control scheme being used is a keyboard and mouse. Would it have been so hard to display icons depicting “E”, “Space”, etc.?
And an example of ultra-boring gameplay
But back to the team discussion above. In retrospect, I think I might have made the team sound a little too proactive. When actually playing the game, it seems the team was dead set on trampling any positive memories of previous Larry outings. The original Leisure Suit Larry does make an appearance in the game, but as a horrendously fat, tall, wannabe porn mogul – with a deep voice and a Brooklyn accent. Being a fan of the original games, I actually found it quite insulting. The story, which I haven’t yet made mention of, involves Larry recruiting his nephew, Larry Loveage to work on a local porn movie lot in order to… never mind. It’s too stupid to relate.
As a regular videogame, Box Office Bust could be overlooked as a completely annoying time waster. As a Leisure Suit Larry game, Box Office Bust is a travesty. With its trifecta of inane gameplay, hideous character models, crass and annoying dialog, Box office Bust is a slap across the collective faces of adventure gamers everywhere. Avoid this one at all costs.
Bonus promo video for the original Leisure Suit Larry
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