ASIAN

North Korean nukes, South Korean robots give birth

by Kris   ⋅   January 5, 2007   ⋅   Comment now   ⋅    RSS

Seoul’s Kyunghee University Medical Center realized that South Korean birth rate is at its lowest dip (about one kid per woman). To accommodate this, they are training its students with “Noelle” the pregnant robot. Because the mannequin was purchased from American company Gaumard Scientific, it’s face is exactly like those CPR dummies with the gaping mouths and creepy closed eyes. I think they just gave it a darker wig. The med students practice strapping Noelle into stirrups, taking vital signs and “delivering” her bouncing (literally) baby. No news on if it has a plastic placenta.

North Korea on the other hand, would love for their “friends” in the South to have an even lower birth rate, and what better way to accomplish that than by mass murder and radiation. Their undisclosed (of course) but suspected plan is to someday launch at least three missiles: one short-range attack on South Korea, one mid-range to Japan, and a long-range sucker to reach America. This is probably why Japan and the U.S. are at the forefront of opposition and why N. Korea merely scoffs at their vain attempts. It would appear that we need to keep seriously kissing China’s ass to aid in precedings, but who can trust a country that has no qualms about touting “Smoopy” and “Rolez” watches as the real deal.